A Month of Thanks - Introduction

Thanksgiving.  It is and has always been my grandmother's favorite holiday.  When I met my husband, he was pretty keen on the day, himself.   When I was younger, it was just a day.  A day that  my family crammed into grandma and grandpa's house, we ate turkey and ham and all of the other obligatory Thanksgiving meal side dishes.  When I was younger, I didn't remember the guys hunting as they do now, I remember Cara and I dancing on the porch, playing in Uncle Mike's bedroom, making Josh play with us when he obviously hated it. It was a family day.  Baseball was over, Mike was home, all four Shelton boys and their families came home.

Now that I have my own little family, I understand why Thanksgiving is so important to my grandmother. She had everyone she loved the most under her roof.  They were all safe and happy, if only for the moment.  isn't that what we all want?  The ones we love to be safe and happy?  

Facebook and blogs alike are all participating in the Month of Thanks.  It's been months since I have blogged, and let's face it, I am really behind on some really big life stuff.  There is a reason for that.  Everything that I want to write about, it hard stuff.  Real, life, hard stuff.  Stuff that I have kept inside, and it is hurting.  Do I want to share it with the world?  No.  Do I want to share it with my children?  No.  Do I need to share it with them? Yes.  

Maybe the words that I write will help someone.  That is my prayer.  If it does, please let me know.  I would love to pray for you, talk with you, instagram with you?  Whatever it may be.  

This month, November, I will join the millions giving thanks.  My thanks will be posted here, for my family and my friends to read and maybe someday I'll print the posts for my children. They are the most important after all.

Thank you for visiting.  Thank you for waiting on me to get back on my game.  Thank you for supporting me.

Keepin it Real

I have a lot of people who read my blog, I'm lucky with that.  I find this avenue such a great way to vent, explain my thoughts, share my dreams, brag about my wonderful family, and speak exactly the thoughts that are on my mind.  Most of the things I put on this blog is for my children.  my children  You know, those two little TaylorTots I am so very lucky to share with Kevin.  This is the way I choose to journal with them, for them to read about our lives when they don't remember.  There isn't anyway possible for us to remember everything, so, this is what we have.  Our lives, my perspective.

It's sad that I have to write this, it's sad to me, anyway.

I want the world to understand that hurting anyone isn't, nor will ever be, my intention.  There are a lot of things that happen in our lives that are not written about.  The reason?  I'm so terribly afraid to hurt anyone's feelings.  I desperately try to please everyone I know. Shocking? Maybe.  Especially if you have ever worked with me.  ")  Life and work life are two completely separate lives to me... at work, I could care less if feelings were hurt.  It wasn't intentional, unless it was warranted.  I expected the people with whom I worked with, for, and who I was responsible for, to work hard and if I felt that anyone wasn't pulling their share (supervisors included) I always made it known.  The problem?  I lead with emotion and leave the logic at the door. I will tell you, though... having two little ones teach you to use logic very quickly.   However, unfortunately, this isn't about a coworker, it's my family.  And let's face it, family and friends are different.

I'm not sure what this is about... I think I've just kept it in for days and really, beside Kevin, I haven't put my feelings into any sort of comprehensible language.  This isn't going to make much sense either, however, it feels good to write. 

Last week, I was told that I have hurt my dad's feelings with this blog.  It wasn't my dad who told me, so that makes me feel a little bit better about the situation, but it still made me question the validity of what I am doing here.  Is it worth it?  

I have spend hours looking back over past blogs, past facebook updates, past everything.  I've looked at things through the eyes of others, though what I think my kids will see later on.  Honestly, the things I have written are all 100% honest and true.  There aren't any fabrications and I stand by everything I have written.  That being said, some of the stories in my life (like every other human in this world) aren't glamorous.  Some of them are really hard.  Guess what, those are the stories I really want to document, but haven't. Why?  because i dont want to hurt anyone.

I guess, at the end of writing this, and explaining what I believe can be explained... I'm good.  I'm good with the blog, I hope to continue writing, even the bad stuff.  This is MY BLOG, my place to document my perspective, and my place to be creative.  Unfortunately, if you read this and are offended, (which may happen) please email me or call me, immediately.  Do not wait days... do not make it about YOU, do not talk over me, and do NOT tell me that I am selfish.  Because, I am NOT.  I have two sweet little people who will tell you in 20 very short years, that their mother loves them with more than she has, and that YOU are the one who missed out.

To everyone else... Please, continue to text, twitter, facebook, and COMMENT.  It makes a girls confidence in this journey much stronger.  

Love to you ALL. (even you who find me via pinterest... just keepin it real)

Vacation: Day 1

If you come here via facebook, THANKS!  I didn't want to post pictures all day long... I started with 150.... aren't you glad I didn't fill up your newsfeed?  :)

 We began our vacation journey, yesterday.  I was a bit worried that once we got everything loaded and on the road, the kids would have a complete melt down.  Much to my surprise, they were perfect.  There were a few small episodes, but we made it and life is wonderful this morning, waking up and looking out the window at the Mississippi river.  very, very, very cool.

So- If you know me, I fly by the seat of my pants.  Always have.  It's a trait :)
When we got to the Oklahoma/Arkansas state line, everyone was still a little high from beginning our vacation, and didn't realize that we would be in the car for eight more hours.  We decided to stop on the side of the road and take a picture with the welcome sign.

The plan was to do this at each state we entered.

Yes, this is just Kev and the tots.  I was behind the camera, where mom is, right?  For the record, Kevin took about six of me and the kids.  I deleted them.  Accidently... PROMISE!

 Driving on the interstate- this is about all you see... I do think it's pretty, though.  I love that I live where trees are abundant.  I just wish I had those "mountains" in the picture at our house.  Someday? :)

After watching Disney's Cars I sorta feel guilty when travelling via interstate... do you?

This is the Russellville, Arkansas Nuclear power plant, named Arkansas Nuclear One. We actually stopped and drove down to it. I have several pictures, but this is my favorite.  I know there are dangers to nuclear power, but people... ITS AWESOME.

Having a nice chat?  We stopped at a hole in the wall place close to the plant for lunch.  It was really pretty good.  That's the rule, right?  While on vacation, search out the craziest places that only locals eat at?  They are the best places, right?

Little Rock came and went like a flash!  Once we got out of Little Rock, we were both (kevin and myself) on un-charted territory.  Neither of us have been south of LR via car.  

 Blayne was starting to get sick of looking at farms by this point :)

"oh, hey there.... i'm just sitting here with a bucket on my head... what?!!"

Yes... Somewhere in southern Arkansas/ northeastern LA peeps drive with a bunch of dogs on their trucks.  Now that I am blogging the picture, it isn't nearly as funny.  However, after being in the car for almost six hours, it was funny to see the floppy ears.  AND- I didn't have cell phone signal to surf facebook or twitter for HOURS.

Had I know that we would driver for hours through farmland... I probably would have taken a nap.  ...oh, wait.

Transylvania, LA (I think...)  It was picture worthy, but the town...not soooo much.

CELL PHONE TOWER!  I'm not even kidding... we went a long, long, LONG time without seeing these. Also, in Oklahoma iPhones are everywhere... not here.  Flip phones, baby.  We get a lot of stares, especially when the kids have them...

Boog loves a good train.... :)

And just when I thought that I had enough soy bean fields (and corn, and cotton, and wheat...)...

We made it to the mighty mississippi river.  I wish I were a photographer/artist.  This bridge is beautiful. The black train bridge, even more so.

This is where we landed for Night 1. The Rainbow hotel and casino.  (They had an indoor pool, people.)

It's really pretty cool.

This is the Mississippi River at sunset.  I promise, this is straight out of the camera.  I didn't filter or edit any of the pictures. I don't have time, and really... who cares?
This is my favorite shot  (that didn't have my kids in it) of the day.  Perfect way to end the day.


It's 9:47 and we are getting ready for Day 2.

 -TeamTaylor

a typical fall day 2011

My grandparents are the biggest influences in my life.  They were my rock the entire time I was growing up, and still to this day, I immediately feel at home when I enter Slick and pull down the street to their house.

When they are gone (I can't even imagine) I know that I will never feel the same about Slick, or the little white house on Pershing street.  What makes that place feel like home, are the two people who live there.

My grandpa is the kindest person I know.  I'm sure there are a TON of stories that I don't know, but I that's the way I like it :)

When I was a little girl, I used to beg to stay at their house any time I could.  I'll admit, my grandpa always seemed a bit old to me.  The reality is, they weren't.  I can sit and think of my most cherished memories of him, and they always seem to be spent outside.  Grandpa would let me go with him to feed the dogs, then we would race back to the house.  I can remember, as I got older, he would run faster in order to teach me that I couldn't always win.  Looking back, I know how hard it was for him to let me win.  You see, Shelton's do not just let people win at anything.

My grandparents were at every softball game and dance recital that I ever played in that were in a 100 mile radius of their house.  EVERY ONE

When I was a little girl, my grandpa would help me climb up on the gate between lots at their house.  Once I was adjusted just right, he would push me through the openings.  I can remember coming in the house with sore and wind-burned cheeks from playing outside so long.

Can you even imagine how I felt, when I witnessed this:

I just stood there, watching my baby girl swing on the gate with my papa.  The same gate I swung on 30 years earlier.  The same strong hands pushing the gate.

The same smile on his face.

When we walked back to the house, Emileigh wanted to hold our hands....   Needless to say, I'll never ever forget this moment the rest of my life.

Dear Blayne

Dear Blayne,

     Today, we made brownies together and took them to Daddy and the guys he works with.  While we were on the way to deliver them, you were talking away about everything you could think about, and about as fast as you could think about it.   You are changing so fast, buddy.  I'm so excited to watch you grow up, but at the same time, it makes me sad that I am not allowed a pause button. 
     You keep Daddy and me cracking up.  I always said you would be as witty as your daddy.  I am pretty sure, you won't make a liar out of me on that.  Depending on your mood, I can be "Ruby-mommy" while you are "Max-Blayne."  You turn me into a dragon when you want me to chase you.... "Oh no!!! Here comes dragon mommy!  Run Emileigh!!!" 
     Your imagination is amazing.  You pretend to be robot Blayne  and everyone else in the house is expected to be robots as well.  You get tired of us, you just come up and pull the lever to shut us down.  If it were only that easy.
     You are adding words to your vocabulary daily, and phrases that use to be difficult, seem to roll off of your tongue.  You are quick to say "No fank you" when you don't want something, and just as quick to say "I'm sorry" when you feel you are just about to get into trouble.  However cute it is, you like to say, "it was just an acks-a-dent, momma" when you know you should be in trouble.  Most of the time, you get out of it though :)
     You love to play with Levi, next door.  In fact, you call him your best friend.  You think that everyone is our best friend, so innocent baby.  I hope you have a lifetime filled with best friends. 
    You sing like an angel when you allow me the opportunity to hear.  You carry the correct tune and it warms my soul to hear it.  You always ask me to sing with you... I am sure that will soon change.  I can't carry a tune in a bucker, buddy.  But until you forbid me from singing, I will join you joyfully. 
     You have such a sweet spirit, love.  If you think I am upset about something, you quickly say, "it's okay momma.  It will be okay."  It breaks my heart that you are so thoughtful.  If something is wrong with sissy, you come find me... "momma, girl is mad- help her." 
    You have a temper.  You love to play outside and the park is your favorite adventure.  You would live at Honor Height's park if we would let you.  Your second favorite thing to do is pick up rocks and sticks and throw them in the water.  You could do this for days.
   Yesterday, we went to Pettit Bay at Lake Tenkiller in Tahlequah.  You were so unhappy when we loaded up to head home.  You cried and cried.  It made me sad.  Daddy and I talked about when we were little and our parent's made us do something we didn't want to do, or understand why we had to do it.  I hate that you felt that yesterday, but you made up for it.  I was trying to console you and you quickly said, "NOT TALK TO ME ANYMORE, MOMMA!"  I am sure when you are 15, my reaction will be much different, however it was super cute.
     I love you, little man.  I love you more than I could ever imagine loving anyone in my entire life.  I hope that you will feel that before you have your own children... My wish is that when you are grown, you will know your parent's loved you with everything we have.  I look forward to more "Blayne-isms" and many, many more laughs. 
                     

                                                                                                                                       love,    Mom :)

Goin' to the chapel.....

Kevin is from Ponca City, and most of what is left of his family still lives there.  We don't ever seem to get there enough and I always feel super guilty when we do go because I tend to drag him to see someone in my family every three days. 

We always come up with some sort of excuse as to why we shouldn't go.  In reality, we should definitely make it more of a priority. 

This blog isn't a premature list of new year resolutions. 

Last Saturday, Kevin and I went to Ponca City to see his nephew, Scott get married. Kevin is the youngest of 8 children, so he and Scott are fairly close in age 6 years.  It is strange to me that when I married Kevin, I immediately became an Aunt and great-Aunt all at the same time :)

We haven't seen Scott in a few years and I was SUPER excited to meet two of his sons.  I almost fell over when I met Eli.  He is six months old and the resemblance to Emileigh is striking.  Infact, his hair grows the exact same as her's.  Mohawk style :)

Liam just turned two, and unfortunately for his parents is LOVING this crazy stage.  He was supposed to walk his momma down the aisle... he screamed the entire time.  To me, it was adorable- I am sure the beauty in the white dress was thinking otherwise.

I can see the resemblance in Liam and Blayne as well..... so strange.


Here is a picture of the Taylor men... Some of them.  Steve and David aren't in it, nor are Scott's other sons.  Maybe this summer (or sooner) we can get them all together and get one.   There I go about those stinkin resolutions again.

Front:  Eli Taylor 6months - Liam Taylor 2 Years

Back: Kevin Taylor, Scott Taylor, Brett Taylor

I apologize for the quality of this photo.  It is actually from a camera phone that I 'borrowed' from facebook :)

we DID it

we made it- we moved.  I forget how exhausting it is.  Most of our things are still packed away in half-emptied boxes strewen about, but oh well... we are here. I love being able to run to the grocery store and be back in 7 minutes. 

We are getting used to the stairs, lol.  We have 15.  I made sure to count them the fifth time I had to climb them.  Blayne fell down them yesterday after climbing the baby gate that was secured to the top of the stairs.  Emileigh will go up the stairs, but then make a little "uhh uhhh" sound until someone comes to her rescue.

Most of their toys are upstairs in their rooms, so I spend a lot of time up here while they play.  Blayne refuses to be up here alone.  We will work on that...

Oh- speaking of Blayne.  He has slept in his own bed all night long the last two nights.  This is a MAJOR accomplishment considering he would come and get in our bed by midnight at the latest at the old house.  He likes Blaynes new room...

M-O-V-I-N-G

It is not a surprise to anyone that I hate living in the sticks of muskogee county.  Actually, I guess it could be worse, I could have zero internet access or satellite.  That would be so bad.


When we moved to this house, we were desperate.  In about a weekend, we came to the conclusion that I would quit work, we would move, and this needed to happen in days, if not minutes.  Our rent and expenses from Kevin driving back and forth from Tulsa to Muskogee for work were astronomical to say the least.  The only way we could afford to let me stay at home (in theory) was to move back to the 'Gee. 

Kevin and I spent a day combing through the newspaper and calling local relators.  We were not (and still are not) ready to purchase due to going from two incomes to one.  We were lucky enough to find a realator who also managed some properties in Muskogee.  That is how we landed here. 

At first glance, I was excited.  I have the granite countertops, I have the stainless steel appliances, I have crown molding, blah blah blah.   I also live 35 minutes from Wal-Mart, 25 Minutes from a grocery store, 15 minutes from a convenience store.  I fight ants and spiders on an hourly basis. I am not even going to begin to speak about the dogs next door, the ones who killed our dog and would do the same to my children.  The ceramic floor tiles in my kitchen are cracking and breaking under our feet.  What do you expect from a house that is 100 years old?  Our roof is a metal one, which might be amazing if, again you arent living in an 800 square foot, 100 year old house.  Being as it is, when it rains, no one sleeps.  I compare it to sleeping under a tarp. Clearly,I read this book by the cover.

Lucky for me, WE ARE MOVING!!! 

We are moving into town, into a neighborhood where other normal people live.  People who have children, not mean pit bull dogs.  I am super excited about this move.  We will gain about 800 square feet plus a two car garage.  We will also gain a fenced in back yard (privacy fence) and a back door for the kids to leave open and come in and out all day.  The only drawback I have at the moment is the fact that there are two bedrooms upstairs with the master down.  This means that my kids will be upstairs.  That will take a little bit of logistical thought, but I am up for it.  I need to purchase baby moniters, and was thinking about whether ot not I would prefer a video monitor.  Do any of my readers have any suggestions?

uncle mike

My uncle Mike came home to visit this week.  I posted on my facebook account that I felt like I did when I was 8 and he would come home to visit.  I was very serious. 

I was born in 1979, Mike's senior year.  I attended my first Bristow High School football game when I was only days old to cheer on my uncle Mike.  I can remember riding in the car for what seemed like hours with my grandparents to watch him play baseball games while he was in college at SWOSU in Weatherford, OK.

I would take my matchbox cars with me because the guys in the dougout would play with me during the games.  I am not sure why they would let me play with them... but I can vividly remember it like yesterday.  I LOVED going to baseball games. 

When I was 6 my uncle Jeff got married, and I can remember the atmosphere being so thick.  Mike was supposed to be in the wedding and was late!  25 years later, I finally asked my grandmother about that.  Her voice always lowers a bit and I hear sadness.  Apparently, on the day that Jeff got married, Mike had a try out with the Phillies in Kansas.  He was offered a contract and all anyone really cared about was that he was late (almost) to Jeff's wedding!   Looking back, how hard would that have been to have to drive 8 hours with the news that you were officially a professional baseball player... then to arrive and not be able to tell anyone. 

I remember Mike working out in the mornings.  He would run and I would always ask to go with him.  Some days, he would allow me to run to the post office with him if I would run back.  He would always run backwards while I would run as fast as I could.  I just wanted to keep up with him.

In the first grade, he came to school with grandma to pick me up.  I was so surprised, he picked me up and put me on his shoulders and walked through the hallways at Washington Elementary.  I will NEVER forget that.

As Mike progressed through the ranks of his baseball career, I saw him less and less.  I was always glad to see him when he game home.  He ALWAYS had the best stuff.  I played a nintendo for the first time at my grandma's house.  Mike brought one back :) 

When I was 10, we went to Oklahoma City and watched him play.  I am pretty sure I smiled for a month afterward.  I still have the baseball with the players signatures on it in my hope chest.  That was MY uncle Mike on the pitching mound.

I always wanted him to be proud of me. I worked really hard when I was young to do good while playing softball.  We even named our team the Phillies :)

I love my Uncle Mike.  I wish he lived closer. 


Here are some pictures of the good ole days-

Ten on Tuesday

10 Ways to Enjoy the Summer

1.  Laying on the couch under a light blanket watching a movie because the air conditioner is down low.
2.  Home Grown, Vine Ripe Tomato - Picked from the vine, into the mouth before even walking in the house.
3.  12 hours of daylight, meaning less depression!
4.  Summer television shows. AKA- big brother!
5.  Fireworks, before children.  Fireworks with a 9 month old and 2 year old is a whole new experience.
6.  freshly cut grass, it smells and looks so wonderful.
7.  Shorts, flip flops, t-shirts.
8.  Swimming pools, waterparks, water!
9.  Flexible schedules, less rushing, more relaxing.
10. Watching my kids play in the sand box, play outside, and explore. 

The Taylor Tots take a bath.

Bath Time is probably the most enjoyable time all day for my kids.  You can say, "Bath!!" and Blayne will drop whatever is in his dirty little boy hands, and come running full speed.  He starts to pull on his shirt, yelling... "baaaaaaff"  it's the cutest thing... well ever.

He has always loved to take a bath.  He began splashing in the sink at just six months.  It is the one thing that will actually calm the beast... the best way to stop a lengthy, I am exhausted, cry.


Emileigh is just beginning to enjoy the bath as much as her brother.  Actually, if Blayne would sit long enough to color in front of her, she would laugh the entire time.  She just loves to watch him do anything.

Lucky for me, I have the coolest kitchen known to man.  Well, in my opinion that is.  It is made just for a mom with a two year old and a six month old.  You see, my sink is awesome!  I can actually give both kids a bath at the same time without killing my back hanging over the bathtub, and worrying about one of them taking a dive in the tub.  The right side of the sink is very deep and large, Blayne can almost swim in it.  The left side is much smaller and just the right size for a little princess.

The following is a typical night at the Taylor Inn.  I hope you enjoy!

Mom: "Blayne, let's take a Bath!!!"              

Blayne: "Baaaaaaaaaafffff"  "on sissy... baaf"

Hey, what are YOU doing here??!!  I'm bout to take a bath.  I have already gathered 57 toys and threw them in the sink while my mom ran the water.  I almost choked myself taking my shirt off... but as you can see. I made it!

 Just what do you think you are doing with that camera lady?!!

What!!??   I can play with my sister??!!! Mom, you are the best in the entire universe!

Blayne:  I love taking a bath.... Just wait until you see what I have in mind for tonight....

Emileigh: Oh, is that the counter... Preeeeeeeety

Just so everyone knows. I really do love my sister and give her lots of kisses.

Tonight though, I figure I had better give the kisses first.

No one wants an upset baby ruining a perfectly good bath.  Muuuah

Okay, Okay, Okay

We will play your stupid games.  I'll pretend you are a baby and you drink this bottle.

HEY- I SAID DRINK!

Here, since you were such a good girl, I'll wash your hair.  

Reeeeeaaaaddddddyyyyy

Gotta scrub it now, momma says we gotta wash our hair.

See, I kinda already did mine.

What? I don't have any hair on the top, it's all on the back?!!  

Don't worry, Mom will get it!  

Stop making fun of my hair!

 Ta Da!  

Poof- you have clean hair.  

Aren't we soooo cute?  

Ha. 

You mean I really have to get out of the bathtub?

Because I would live in here if you would let me.