Keepin it Real

I have a lot of people who read my blog, I'm lucky with that.  I find this avenue such a great way to vent, explain my thoughts, share my dreams, brag about my wonderful family, and speak exactly the thoughts that are on my mind.  Most of the things I put on this blog is for my children.  my children  You know, those two little TaylorTots I am so very lucky to share with Kevin.  This is the way I choose to journal with them, for them to read about our lives when they don't remember.  There isn't anyway possible for us to remember everything, so, this is what we have.  Our lives, my perspective.

It's sad that I have to write this, it's sad to me, anyway.

I want the world to understand that hurting anyone isn't, nor will ever be, my intention.  There are a lot of things that happen in our lives that are not written about.  The reason?  I'm so terribly afraid to hurt anyone's feelings.  I desperately try to please everyone I know. Shocking? Maybe.  Especially if you have ever worked with me.  ")  Life and work life are two completely separate lives to me... at work, I could care less if feelings were hurt.  It wasn't intentional, unless it was warranted.  I expected the people with whom I worked with, for, and who I was responsible for, to work hard and if I felt that anyone wasn't pulling their share (supervisors included) I always made it known.  The problem?  I lead with emotion and leave the logic at the door. I will tell you, though... having two little ones teach you to use logic very quickly.   However, unfortunately, this isn't about a coworker, it's my family.  And let's face it, family and friends are different.

I'm not sure what this is about... I think I've just kept it in for days and really, beside Kevin, I haven't put my feelings into any sort of comprehensible language.  This isn't going to make much sense either, however, it feels good to write. 

Last week, I was told that I have hurt my dad's feelings with this blog.  It wasn't my dad who told me, so that makes me feel a little bit better about the situation, but it still made me question the validity of what I am doing here.  Is it worth it?  

I have spend hours looking back over past blogs, past facebook updates, past everything.  I've looked at things through the eyes of others, though what I think my kids will see later on.  Honestly, the things I have written are all 100% honest and true.  There aren't any fabrications and I stand by everything I have written.  That being said, some of the stories in my life (like every other human in this world) aren't glamorous.  Some of them are really hard.  Guess what, those are the stories I really want to document, but haven't. Why?  because i dont want to hurt anyone.

I guess, at the end of writing this, and explaining what I believe can be explained... I'm good.  I'm good with the blog, I hope to continue writing, even the bad stuff.  This is MY BLOG, my place to document my perspective, and my place to be creative.  Unfortunately, if you read this and are offended, (which may happen) please email me or call me, immediately.  Do not wait days... do not make it about YOU, do not talk over me, and do NOT tell me that I am selfish.  Because, I am NOT.  I have two sweet little people who will tell you in 20 very short years, that their mother loves them with more than she has, and that YOU are the one who missed out.

To everyone else... Please, continue to text, twitter, facebook, and COMMENT.  It makes a girls confidence in this journey much stronger.  

Love to you ALL. (even you who find me via pinterest... just keepin it real)